The Last-Born Child

The Last-Born Child

 

   What is the birth order of an individual among his or her siblings? That has a very crucial impact on their future personalities and characters. Birth order contributes a lot to what we call individual differences and it explains, along with other factors, why children born in the same family and raised by the same parents show distinct attitudes and abilities.

  Many studies in Child Psychology have been showing that usually, the first-born child is more confident, adventurous, and achiever than his or her siblings, especially superior to the last-born. Why this is so? Because, the firstborn, due to his or her position in the family, receives an undiluted parental love. Parents are very careful and ambitious about their first babies. They are raised in a more disciplined way and with very positive expectations. In contrast, the last-born fails to get all this and is less likely to accomplish significant academic and social achievements as compared to their elder siblings.

 

The Youngest Child Syndrome

 

  The last-born child has a unique disposition, tendencies, problems, and challenges due to his or her specific position in the family. In the third world, where parenting is a hard job due to immense financial issues, too many kids, and illiteracy, the issue of a last-born child becomes even more alarming.

  Parents and teachers need to comprehend the specific factors that negatively affect the personality growth of a last-born child.

 

Challenges for a last-born

 

1.  Weaker genetic basis: The last child comes into the world when his or her parents are usually in their late 30’s or 40’s. In that phase of life, people are more likely to be physically exhausted, emotionally vulnerable, and psychologically unstable. These weaknesses of parents affect the last-born in every possible way and he or she gets a quite shaky ground for their personal growth. On the other hand, the first child is born in a youthful and vigorous age of their parents and leaves the nest with strong enough wings.

2.  Directionless and imbalanced upbringing: Parents are usually very passionate and ambitious about their first babies. They raise and train their first babies in a planned manner. They pay attention to every single move of their first children and devote themselves to nurturing the earliest flowers of their family garden. But when come to the last-born, either they are too tired or discouraged by the disappointing outcomes of elder children’s parenting. Therefore, for the last-born, they dare not have any high ambitions, rather only good wishes! To compensate it, they do nothing but to spoil him or her with over- loving. The youngest kid enjoys much less parental enthusiasm and as a result, never acquires optimal self-esteem in life.

3.  Babied and Spoiled: Getting out of proportion amount of affection actually doesn’t help the youngest child building a mature personality, balanced both in emotional and intellectual aspects. Being a baby of the family, he or she falls into a fallacy of thinking that the outer world would be as kind and adoring as the inner world of loving parents and caring siblings. This is bound to bring disappointments and heart-breaks, sooner or later and unrealistic expectations from non-related people make the job of handling social relations and responsibilities harder for the last-born.

4.  Not being original: The eldest child doesn’t have a sibling model to follow and therefore, for most of his or her life, they are free to express their true original self without getting inspiration from other children. But when it comes to the youngest child, there are already several role models, tempting him or her to act and behave in certain ways whether align with or opposite to their own natural dispositions and inclinations. The last-born, often, has no choice but to imitate their elder brothers and sisters in almost every department of childhood; sporting, learning, friend-making, pursuing hobbies, etc. Inducing a kind of suggestibility in their choices may very easily lead to an identity crisis in youngest children.

5.  Sibling abuse: Child psychologists and counselors, often note the abuse of youngest children by their elder siblings. The elder brothers and sisters may treat their last-born siblings as an object of manipulation and a mean to exercise their authoritative skills. They may make fun of them, call their names and dictate them in in-door sports. This may dent the fledgling self-respect of a last-born child. 

 

All the above factors affecting the personal growth of a child due to birth order need to be taken seriously by parents, teachers, and counselors. Being a last-born in a family has both positive and negative implications. The goal of child-raising and school education should be to maximize the advantages and minimizing the challenges for the last-born.

 

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